DPM's diary: 12 September 2006

Weekly round up of events at Bodcaster City Council


We have now managed to secure the funds necessary to stave off the threat of redundancies, but there are two outstanding issues.

The first is the rehabilitation of Charlie, whose weak-kneed quiescence in the face of rapacious demands from the accountants got us into this mess in the first place.

This problem is, however, easily resolved in the traditional manner. I let it be known that all drinks in the Flea and Faceache tonight would be free of charge, and Charlie sheepishly arrived at closing time to pay the bill and be accepted back into society. He now has a second mortgage.

The second issue will need more thought. Do we proceed with the sale of the Linux laptop business or don't we?


After a frustrating time a few years ago trying to source non-Grates laptops at a reasonable price, we set up a small team to buy units, configure and maintain them.

Essentially, we are talking two engineers in a shed at the bottom of Dave's garden and a man in Manila who ships us the hardware. Dave's lads can turn out anything up to 150 laptops a week, fully software configured and ready to roam, at about £300 a piece. All secondary school children in Bogcaster are issued with one.

True, most of them sell them down the market once they discover they are no good for gaming, but hey, that is part of their education also. Anyway, faced with the cuts issue, we put out a few feelers to see if anyone was interested in buying the enterprise. Seems they are.


As the Linux laptop business turned over £1.5m last year, we have been able to creatively account ourselves a trading position that shows future growth to £10m over three years and a profit of about 25% on sales. The company may be worth several million.

Trouble is, what we actually have here is two deadbeats in a garden shed with a router and a couple of sets of precision screwdrivers. Still, that never stopped Enron did it?


With prospective purchasers coming tomorrow we have made a few last minute cosmetic changes. Mavis used her persuasive charms to full effect on the manager of Bogcaster Science Park.


A number of interested parties are welcomed to Bog2Go's two floors of offices and 30,000 feet of warehouse and factory space, all resplendent in company colours which, purely co-incidentally, are identical to those of the previous tenant, who went bust last month. By the end of the day we had several indications that firm offers would be in the post.

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