Question: Sorry David - talk me through dealing with a neg?
My Answer : (Stolen from here)
Approach them at their desk, ensure there are other people (witnesses) present. Remember that negs thrive by telling others that you never pay them any attention, or ask their opinion on anything. You are about to disprove this. Make idle chat, not just with neg, but with the group of people around him/her. Raise a subject about which you know neg has an interest, or skill, or is involved in their job. Then, warmly ask for their thoughts on a particular aspect of this. It is brilliant, because they cannot announce they have no thoughts! I have done this many times, and many negs have turned around - and complained about me to my face, which is exactly what I was seeking!
When negs reach positions of power they often become bullies - business bullying is becoming a big issue in organisations. If you are ever bullied - my definition is if anyone says or does something that worries or frightens you, verbally or otherwise, do something about it.
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Question: Sorry David - talk me through dealing with a psychic vampire?
My Answer :
OK - Rosalind (my wife) and I were at a summer bbq when we met a lady for whom the glass was not so much half empty, it was shattered all over the ground. She was talking about which school she might send her daughter - Rosalind suggested one - the woman disagreed, saying she had heard it was "not a good school" - Rosalind said it was "ok" to which she was told it was "not" it was "one of the worst schools in the area." And so it progressed until this lady was in a right state and the atmosphere in the air was very uncomfortable.
And then Rosalind played her ace card - she thought and said "You know, thinking about it, I agree with you" - the lady said "what do you mean?" Rosalind said "I have heard bad things about that school, as well" - to which the astonishing (and expected) reply was "Well, i've heard its not that bad" and so on - as Rosalind said the school was worse and worse, each time this lady said it was better and better, until after just a few minutes she told everyone that was THE SCHOOL for her daughter. All because of the words:
"You know, thinking about it, agree with you"
That is an extreme example - when people moan, complain or have a go, agree with them - sometimes this in itself is enough to calm a situation, to make them feel more comfortable and perhaps even see your point of view.
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