DPM's diary: 11 December 2007

Catch up with events from Bogcaster Council

Monday

"This clampdown on social networking, does it mean that we can't talk to people in office time?" asked Mavis.

"Not unless it is about business. We are cutting down on people using work time for personal matters." I explained.

As I left the office that evening, I discovered that the Jag's battery was flat and I had to wait over an hour for the AA man to come. Though why I called Alcoholics Anonymous in the first place is a mystery.

Tuesday

I told Mavis about the flat battery when I came in. "You might have thought someone would have said something," I said. "Oh they did, several people e-mailed to say you had left your lights on."

"So why didn't you tell me!"

"I was going to, but it sounded like talking about personal matters in work time to me and you said... anyway I deleted all e-mails and added the senders to our new social networking abusers register."

Wednesday

The flood of Christmas cards from people I have never met working for companies I have never heard of is in full swing. Twenty seven this morning. You can tell who has spent time and money on a professional image designer, who has chosen carefully from the charity catalogue and who has just left it to the temp in the office to order the cheapest.

The latter approach is probably best as they all go straight in the bin anyway. I remember when we used to get bottles of scotch and tickets for West End shows. Not, of course, that I was ever unduly influenced by these blandishments. Especially if the show tickets were non-transferable and the scotch was blended.

Thursday

Met up with old colleagues Mo "Moneypenny" Howsyerfather, Laura Minesaguiness, Jib Bullfrog, and Keeps Whoring for a seasonal snifter. We come mainly to pay homage to the Lone Jedi, but on this occasion he failed to show - probably realigning the karma of a San some place.

Keeps is a man who makes Bernard Manning seem like a Guardian-reading liberal who respects social workers and rejoices in our multi-cultural society. He once told me my open sauce should be sent back where it came from and believes that object oriented programming is to be discouraged on the ground that it sounds gay.

He tells us his employers have appointed him to the Diversity Steering Group. Don't worry Keeps, it will be good for your pay and reward points - or maybe not.

Friday

Christmas shopping. Well... I need stuff.




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