29 thoughts I had while trying to set up a new Windows 8.1 machine

Everyone has their Achilles heel of technology, and although I’ve been very familiar with the Windows operating system until now, Windows 8 machines are far too stressful for me to get my head around. Here are 29 thoughts I had during my most recent attempt at setting up a new Windows 8.1 machine: 

1. So many terms and conditions 

2. Scroll through…

3. So many! 

4. But it’s ok, because I get to customise with a pretty colour.


5. Not very business-like, but let’s go for PURPLE. 


6. What, I need a Microsoft account to use a computer now? 

7. Maybe I can skip it… 

8. No, no I can’t. 

9. Two factor authentication takes such a long time!

10. At least it’s keeping me safe. 

11. Wow, it’s taking a long time to set up!

12. I wonder if it’s frozen? 

13. Have I broken it? 

14. It says don’t turn off… 

15. “Almost ready”


16. Really? 


17. You’ve been saying that for 5 minutes now.

18. I’ve broken it and I’ve not even done anything yet.


19. Finally the desktop! 

20. The panels are sort of cool

21. I like how some of them update in real time. 

22. Why does anything I try to open go straight to classic view? 

23. What’s the point of the panel view if that’s just going to happen? 

24. I keep forgetting Windows button doesn’t do Windows button things anymore…

25. How do I find the settings? Where’s the control panel?

26. This operating sy stem doesn’t know what it wants to be.

27. How do I get to my documents? Where are those guys hiding?

28. How do I use this app store, where are the things I need?

29. Never mind, I’ll do it on my phone.