Welcome our robot overlords for they come bearing cake

As all tech experts know, it is only a matter of time before artificial intelligence (AI) takes over the world, eliminates all our jobs, creates Skynet and the terminator, and enslaves us all in the Matrix. We can’t wait to read the terms and conditions page.

For those who see this as something to fear and fight against, early experiments in AI can reveal the likely tactics our robot overlords plan to employ.

A PhD student in San Diego, Janelle Shane, has discovered one of the first tricks the automatons will use. She’s training a neural network to create cookbook recipes, and the early output of her work offers a valuable glimpse into the cunning minds of the AI.

Among the recipes suggested so far by our future leaders are:

  • Chocolate Chops & Chocolate Chips
  • Export Bean Spoons In Pie-Shell, Top If Spoon and Whip The Mustard
  • Chocolate Pickle Sauce
  • Whole Chicken Cookies
  • Salmon Beef Style Chicken Bottom
  • Completely Meat Chocolate Pie
  • Chocolate Chicken Chicken Cake
  • Chocolate Chips With Chocolate Chips
  • Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate Cake

Here at Downtime, the prospect of quadruple chocolate cake has already sent half the team into a spin and destroyed all productivity. Meat chocolate pie took care of most of the rest, with the final cohort lost with their face in chocolate chicken chicken cake.

Robots won’t even need to take our jobs, just offer chocolate cake. No need to work, and a life of cake. The future won’t be all bad.