Monday
"First the good news," said our head of regeneration. "I have
just heard that Bwillmuzchyskie Andripzov are to build the new
Regional IT Centre in Bogcaster". "If that's the good news, I can
only assume the bad involves mass species exterminations, my own
imminent demise and the relegation of Wolverhampton Wanders to
League 1 of the Championship," I responded.
In fact it was worse than that. In order to secure the deal to
bring 15-20 call centre jobs to the science park, Bogcaster City
Council has signed a strategic partnership deal with Regional IT
Centres, a "government supported" company trading with local
government.
Tuesday
A Companies House check on our new partner reveals it has yet to
file any accounts. However, the list of directors is interesting.
They include a disgraced former IT manager, a thoroughly disliked
IT management pundit, and no fewer than three refugees from
recently wound-up government bodies.
Wednesday
Jonathan, our new partner liaison officer from Regit, came
visiting. He made an appointment for 2pm - not a good start. I ate
in the canteen. Returning at 1.55pm, I nodded to him as he sat in
reception. The Times Suduko was particularly difficult today, so it
was nearly 3pm before I was able to see him.
He started pleasantly enough, but then the demands started. Can
he meet with my senior staff? Answer, "They are very busy, maybe
the second week of November?" Can he have an office? Answer,
"Certainly, I will get Mavis to arrange that." Can he have a pass?
Answer, "Certainly, as soon as we have completed the security
clearance. Just hand your birth certificate, NHS registration card,
last six years of bank statements, full set of school reports,
dental record card and blood and urine samples to Mavis on the way
out."
Thursday
Mavis has found an office for Jonathan. It is at our local
office in the centre of the Old Forest housing estate. In terms of
comparative social development, Old Forest makes East Manchester
look like Richmond upon Thames. Local people have been know to
emigrate to Sierra Leone in search of a safer environment and
better job opportunities. The life expectancy of someone called
Jonathan, wearing a suit and driving a new Mondeo with a full
year's road tax clearly displayed, ought to be measured in minutes,
if not seconds.
Friday
Department closed for St Patrick's day. None of us are Irish,
but we do like Guinness.