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Tuesday 08 October 2002 02:59
You'd think that after taking a week off to produce something different for a bumper 20th anniversary issue, Soap would have plenty to write about.

That's what you'd think.

And not for the first time, dear reader - who the hell thought of that phrase anyway? - you'd be wrong. Not that we want you to take it to heart or anything. It's really not your fault you keep getting things wrong.

Lots of people make mistakes. You just happen to make them more often than everyone else.

And frankly, it's becoming embarrassing.

What's the motive?
One we missed out on last week because of our mammoth 20th anniversary issue was the release from Computer 2000, headed "Move over Mr Motivator".

Here's a flavour of this particular announcement: "He may not wear lycra, but Computer 2000's training manager, Jez Toole, knows just as much about motivating people as GMTV's gym guru."

Spurious links with TV, music or showbiz are, of course, a common device for PR men and women seeking to inject some excitement and topicality into their releases, but this one does seem to be trying especially hard.

For a start, Mr Motivator isn't news any more. Anyway, trying to get people to keep fit is one thing, but how you can link it to helping staff to take national vocational
qualifications is taxing the very best brains here at Soap - admittedly, not something that's hard to do.

Oh, but wait, we've found something that explains everything. In a quote explaining the importance of NVQs, Jez describes them as "very motivating for employees".

Obvious really. But not very funny.

Green, but not with envy
And while we're not being very funny, how about this? AMD was boasting last week about being honoured with a 2002 Green Power Leadership Award by the US Department of Energy and the US Environmental Protection Agency.

Given the leading role the US has taken on environmental issues since the George Dubya Bush administration took office - it's leading the world in trashing anything which might try to address the threat posed by global warming by setting emission targets - we wonder whether AMD's award might be tarnished (polluted is far too strong a word) by its government's policies.

Mind you, here at Soap, we're immensely pleased with our Enron accountancy award.